Disney Dialogues: Things Imma Tell My Kids

Disney has been a huge part of my childhood. When I was five or six, my dad would get me a new Disney film every other evening and we’d all watch it together. Animated films like Winnie the Pooh, Toy Story, The Fox and the Hound, Finding Nemo, Pocahontas, Bambi, Robin Hood, Pinocchio, The Little Mermaid, Tarzan, Peter Pan, Aladdin etc. teach a kid so much about friendship, morals, love, teamwork, choices, dreams, growing up, the importance of kindness and life in general. If I ever have children, I would love to share this part of my life with them and ensure they take with them the same lessons.

But besides the endearing story, striking animation and lovable characters, it's the songs and dialogues that appeal to me. I've spent countless hours watching Disney films (repeatedly), and have developed an art of quoting the right Disney dialogue at the right moment. So much so, I realized that a number of them can be used as retorts to unruly children and overbearing teenagers, or as encouraging words when a kid needs some motivation. I set about compiling a list of dialogues I’d deliver to my kids if/when the relevant situation came up, complete with YouTube videos for tone and inflection, including the songs I’d break into at the appropriate moments.

Disney-inspired things I'm going to tell my kids if they:

      1.     Are getting ready for their first day of school:

      “Listen to your teacher and no fighting. Play nice with the other kids. Unless of course, one of the other kids wanna fight, then you have to kick the other kid's butt.” — Mushu, Mulan

      2.     Face peer pressure:

“Now remember, beee yourself.” — Genie, Aladdin

      3.     Make a mess:
“What kind of primitive beasts are responsible for this mess..?” - Terk, Tarzan

 
4.  Grumble about being taken them somewhere they didn’t think would be fun:

“Adventure is out there!” — Ellie, Up

      5.     Ask for a geography lesson (on South America):

“South America. It's like America. But south.” — Ellie, Up

      6.     Complain about the mundaneness of house chores:

“In every job that must be done, 
there is an element of fun. 
You find the fun and...
SNAP! The job's a game!” — Mary Poppins 

      7.     Ever suffer from low self-esteem:

“You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” — Christopher Robin, Winnie the Pooh

      8.     Are on the verge of giving up a task at hand:
“Giving up is for rookies.” — Phil, Hercules (couldn't find a video)

      9.     Lie:

     “A lie keeps growing and growing until it's as plain as the nose on your face.” — The Blue Fairy, Pinocchio

    10.  Disobey me in a hyperactive fit or didn't study:

    “I know that your powers of retention
Are as wet as a warthog's back side. 
But thick as you are, pay attention!
My words are a matter of pride.

It's clear from your vacant expressions,
The lights are not all on upstairs...” — Scar, The Lion King

    11.  Can't empathize:
“If you walk the footsteps of a stranger, 
you'll learn things you never knew
you never knew.” — Pocahontas

12.  Feel low or unhappy about something:
“Look for the bare necessities, 
the simple bare necessities, 
forget about your worries and your strife!” — Baloo, The Jungle Book

    13.  Find themselves in a moral conundrum:
“Always let your conscience be your guide.” — The Blue Fairy/Jiminy Cricket, Pinocchio

    14.  Didn't like what was for dinner:

     “A dinner here is never second best!” — Lumière, Beauty and the Beast

     15.  Try to bribe me into letting them have their own way:
“I don't make deals with peasants!” — Kuzco, The Emperor’s New Groove

                                         

16.     Said or did something incredibly stupid:

      “I’m surrounded by idiots.” — Scar, The Lion King

17.     Need to hear some inspiring words:
“Set your sights,
Upon the heights,
Don't be a mediocrity.
Don't just wait
and trust to Fate
and say that's how it's meant to be.
It's upto you, how far you go,
if you don't try you'll never know.
And so my lad, as I've explained.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained!” — Merlin, The Sword in the Stone

Of course, there are innumerable quotable gems in non-Disney movies that deserve their own lists, but I couldn’t resist adding a couple from The Lord of the Rings to my arsenal. If my kids:

- Were late for the school bus:
   “Fly you fools!” — Gandalf, The Fellowship of the Ring

- Refused to study:
   “YOU SHALL NOT PASS!” — Gandalf, The Fellowship of the Ring

Oh yeahhh. My kids are gonna be awesome.

Luminescence

The squeaking of the rusty swing in the deserted play area of the garden is a note foreign, intruding upon the sonance of the night.

The light zephyr carries with it secrets whispered to it by the frangipanis, as it blows through their flowering tree, loosening a blossom. The flower surrenders itself and is given a gentle lift by the breeze before it collapses onto the cropped grass. A bat, almost camouflaged in the dark, flutters out from a tree and disappears into the night.

The moon is almost full, sailing in her ascent to her cherished spot in the sky from where she reigns as the hours pass on. The clouds move with her, guarding her jealously. They claim her beauty for their own, refusing to share it with the world below. She peeks out shyly from behind an opening in the clouds that obstinately remain before her, a glimmer of her iridescence illuminating what little of the garden it falls upon, making the leaves glisten and outlining the empty playground, silent, but for a frog croaking harshly under the slide.

Finally, the wind intercedes and nudges the clouds, reminding them that their journey lies onward, elsewhere. Reluctantly they float on, leaving bare a jewelled sky, revealing the glowing orb in all her glory to beam down on earth.

The garden lies still in her luminescence, unmoved but for an observer who has been watching the transpiration, swaying wordlessly on the rusty swing.

A monologue with the words in my head

To the words in my head:

It never ceases to amaze and exasperate me how you suddenly start bouncing around in my head on Pogo sticks, like kids high on candy, the second I turn my laptop off. But when it's on? Oh no! Then your kin must flee to skulk in some nook or cranny in the recesses of my mind, refusing to comply, like a teen that just hit puberty. You wouldn't deign to linger long enough for me to open a Word document, or find a notebook or some paper to scribble your form on, no matter how much I plead. You even made me miss my self-imposed deadline of publishing a post every fortnight. Selfish gits, the lot of you.

It gives you great satisfaction doesn't it, when I stare blankly at my laptop screen, waiting for you to come out of hiding and flow as beautifully and effortlessly as you do when I'm otherwise occupied. It's not that you're timid, oh no. Your hyperactive babbling is evidence enough of that. You refuse to relent even when I am in the office and have a demanding assignment on hand; you know well enough that I can't turn my back on it and pay attention to you!

This other matter has little to do with my alternate career as a writer, which, thanks to you, currently hangs from a precipice, but why not bring it up now and get it done with?
You do the opposite when I must make a point to someone. You deliberately disobey all rules of sentence structure, and shatter the very foundations of coherency in communication when I open my mouth to validate my thoughts, thus making me sound like a blithering idiot.

As far as writing is concerned, well, you can't elude me forever. For in just a few hours I will finally receive my iPhone that I so despise from the repair shop where it's been languishing for the past two weeks (the reason behind my distaste for the gadget will serve as a story for another time). Enjoy your shenanigans while you can. Your infantile antics are about come to an end, as I intend to lasso you and pin you down mercilessly onto the Blogger app the second I have my phone back online.

Consider yourself duly warned.

- A disgruntled writer

the much-delayed return of what seems to be self-assurance.

Dear Reader,
(if anyone but me is reading this that is)

Have you been wondering where the devil I am? Excuse the archaic latter half of the interrogative if you think it inappropriate for this century; I have recently discovered Sherlock Holmes, and while I can't really recall reading it in any of his cases, I feel I must credit it to a possible dialogue uttered by Watson.

I digress, as usual. If you've been with me right from the beginning, you might perhaps be aware that I often do so. I think it a little entertaining. Do you?

Anyway. I have a confession/outburst/resolution to make.

This blog was meant to be for me. My little spot where I could nurture my writing. It was supposed to be an outlet for the creativity that lay dormant deep within me. It was meant to transform that dormancy into a seething, ferocious active volcano that would erupt with fabulous vignettes. Because I was told by near and dear and loved and not so loved ones that I had a gift with words. That I could write. That the drivel I often spouted had the potential to be something greater (okay those last few words are mine but the near and dear and loved and not so loved ones meant the same thing). For a time the volcano remained busy. But then somehow, somewhere, my blog lost its identity and as a writer, so did I. I began to crave followers, comments, page views, like an obsessed wanna-be tween with a newly uploaded profile picture on Facebook (I think I'm being unfair to tweens everywhere. I could accuse plenty of adults of harbouring the same obsession). At one point I even longed for my blog to be one of the most-read in the country. To be on those ranking lists. Phooey.

Don't get me wrong. I'm grateful to my followers. It makes me feel good that there are people out there who think what I write is worth reading (even if a lot of them are my friends who I've coerced into doing so) and who take the time to discern the annoying-as-hell captcha code and post a comment. I still feel a thrill when on the rare occurrence, I notice a new follower has joined the ranks of My Beloved Stalkers.

Reading so many different blogs, especially local ones, somehow got me muddled about what I began blogging for. I'm not really interested in telling people here what to do with their time and where to go. There are plenty of other blogs on which they can find that kinda info. I don't care to give anyone advice. I will perhaps continue chronicling interesting events I attend as they are part of my experiences and I believe there's something to learn from every encounter, every experience, although I think my last few posts have only been about events, which is going to lessen. I'm pretty sure I have more to write about than to inform people in many words of what a good time I'm having.

Of course, it is a part of every writer's dream to be read. To be recognized. To see their name in print. To write something that an editor thinks is worth publishing. And get published. And keep getting published. On second thought, I'm not going to generalize. I don't really know any other aspiring writers (but one) so I'm not going to speak for anyone. This is a part of my dream.

I don't want to lose my touch and I fear very much that I will if I continue my disappearances for such frequent and prolonged hiatuses. I don't want my blog to die. I don't know why I stopped posting for so long - it might be listlessness, a waning of enthusiasm, an inexplicable reticence, of not wanting to be read mingled with a despair of 'oh who's going to read it anyway', which in retrospect is quite unfair, as I'm pretty certain there at least 8 people who regularly read my deviating narratives and like them. It's definitely not writer's block, for I have many more drafts than actual posts. I think I just have a serious problem with finishing what I begin writing - I need to be completely satisfied with the conclusion.

But this has gone on for far too long. I am suddenly overcome with an impatient fervour to just sign into Blogger and do nothing but type.

To ensure that something (of hopefully, considerable quality) is churned out at regular intervals on my darling blog, I solemnly swear that, henceforth, I will have a post out (and not just save it as a draft, but hit the 'Publish' button) atleast once every fortnight.

I do value and welcome your feedback, criticisms and any pointers you may have for me. How else will I improve? Whether you love a post or hate it, I want to know. Especially if you hate it. Unless it's in your nature to just hate and spread the hate for the sake of it. Then I don't really want to hear from you, as I dislike unnecessary unpleasantness, more so if it's uncalled for. The alliterations were unintentional (HA!!).

Oh and in case you were wondering where the devil I've been (come to think of it, I might have lifted the expression from a Wodehouse novel), I found my first full-time job and have been working since Jan-end, and vacationed in Central Europe (yes, again) for three weeks in Aug-Sept. So I've plenty to write about.

Since you've been such a patient reader, I'll leave you with a not-so-terrible photo I took (of Schloss Eckberg, a hotel in Dresden, Germany that serves the most gorgeous and delicious breakfast EVER) and Bertie Wooster's endearing words of farewell: Tinkerty-tonk!

Schloss Eckberg and the sun peering though the branches

Lessons from The Ten Commandments: A Management Student's Perspective

I just watched The Ten Commandments again, one of my dad's all time favourites. It stunned me to see how many underlying messages it held of management and marketing. Here's what you can learn from the 1956 movie, starring Charlton Heston and the ultra awesome and exotic Yul Brynner (remember The King and I? Etcetera etcetera etcetera).

Disclaimer: This is in relation to the events in the movie The Ten Commandments (1956) and ONLY the movie and is NOT a religious post. It is not my intention to hurt anyone's sentiments so don't accuse me of blasphemy or disrespect. Prophets were many things, this is just one aspect that has not been previously discussed. Please take it in the right spirit. Now read on :)

1) Offer your slaves, er employees, incentives and they will be happier workers.

While Moses is still the Prince of Egypt, the Hebrew slaves are whipped and driven mercilessly to give their all in construction of the temples in time for the Pharoah's jubilee. Prince Moses is sent to oversee the work as Rameses' methods are not bringing in quicker results. What does Moses do? He treats the people with respect and kindness, gives them more rations of grain by raiding the temple granaries and granting them a day off every week. In short, he gives them incentives. The people though not satisfied in the circumstances of course (let's not forget they're still driven like slaves), are motivated to work.

Lesson: Offer relevant incentives that will motivate and satisfy employees. Most importantly, don't treat them like slaves else they will leave your company like the Hebrews left Egypt.

2) A brand ambassador with a great personality can work wonders.

When the Hebrews are rushing through the parting of the Red Sea, Joshua, Moses’ second-in-command, suggests to him - 'stand on that rock, you'll give them hope.' Seeing the wisdom of the suggestion, Moses takes his advice.

Lesson: Strive to be a figure of inspiration, a brand ambassador to your company and the world.

3) The importance of a leader having reliable backup cannot be undermined.

Joshua does his fair share of organizing the tribes and cattle of thousands in the exodus. He is a good man, very likable, a motivator with unshakable faith in Moses, while extremely efficient in getting things done. As seen in the point above, Moses values his feedback and takes his suggestions seriously.

Lesson: Invest in competent and loyal managerial staff, giving sincere thought to their ideas and suggestions. Encouraging two-way communication and incorporating a system of decentralized decision making will keep employees motivated and ensure the company runs smoothly and successfully.

4) Beware of employees that hold their interests above the good of the company.

Dathan is a Hebrew slave, an extremely annoying character in the movie who has wormed his way into the Pharoah's good graces. When the Hebrews are freed, he loses his position of authority over the slaves as he too must join the exodus, albeit against his will. The snake that he is, he consistently tries to turn the people against Moses and towards himself, but never succeeds, as Moses always has a wondrous miracle that reassures the people.

Lesson: Be wary of employees sowing discord in the office by spreading malicious lies, and who wouldn’t think twice about stooping low enough to malign the company if it meant furthering their own interest.

5) Customer loyalty cannot be taken for granted.

While Moses is at Mount Sinai receiving the Ten Commandments from God, most of his people think he will not return. They astonishingly renounce their age old faith and, enticed by Dathan’s inflammatory speeches, turn away from their beliefs.

Lesson: Don’t take your existing customers for granted. Failure to execute timely communication or advertising will result in your customers feeling neglected, giving your competitors an ideal opportunity to lure them from you.

6) Make your own decisions.

Nefertiri, the wife of the Pharoah Rameses, goads her husband into going after Moses and to defy God. Rameses, the egotist that he is, ignores the advice of his counsellors and is incited against his better judgement, consequently following Moses and his people with his army in bitter rage, which eventually leads to his own decided destruction.

Lesson: Listen to what all your Board members and officers have to say, but ultimately any decision rests with you. Rely on your own intelligence, morals and experience; keep sentiments and ego strictly out of business, else you might end up like Rameses, losing everything.

So let it be written.

(Note on the text: The position of the Hebrews changes from employees to customers because of the change in their relationship with Moses, who goes from Egyptian prince to Hebrew prophet).

blitz

The girl smiled peacefully in her sleep, dreaming a lovely dream.

Little did she know she was being watched.

The observer rubbed her hands in glee. She had just found her next victim. The ones in deep, sweet sleep were always the ones that gave her the most satisfaction. Never being entitled to the pleasure of losing herself in a dream, she felt she had the right to crush the ones of those that did.

Jealously, she looked at the inert girl and tried to speculate what fantasy the latter's subconscious might be conjuring up but she couldn't, being cursed with a dreamless sleep.

She smiled cruelly and struck.

The girl didn't know what hit her. She stirred, her dream shattering.

Drunk on the successful implementation of her nefarious plot, the evil intruder flew off, leaving no trace of her visit except for a tiny swelling on the girl's elbow.